Wages? and Final stages?
VIEIRA: I’M STAYING
Knowing a bit about Real Madrid’s marketing policy and their racist Ultra Sur fans, the Fiver’s fairly confident that if Patrick Vieira looked like a supermodel he would now be gingerly towelling himself down at the Bernabeu next to his fellow galaticos. But today, having “spent the summer considering my future and a possible move to Real Madrid,” Vieira decided that Real’s paltry wage offer, sorry, his “love for Arsenal” was enough to keep him at Highbury.
“I’m proud to be captain of the club and I’m looking forward to achieving my ambitions,” the Arsenal captain added, breaking a silence that would’ve done Chaplin, circa 1926, proud. More churlish folk than us would suggest these “ambitions” have usually included trying to do one – after all, Pat’s been linked with Real in three of the last four years (“I do not honestly see Arsenal finishing in the top five – and you can forget the Big Cup” in 2001) while, according to Sir Alex Ferguson, Vieira wanted to join United in 2002 “but Arsenal canada goose coat 1000 bulbs garland wouldn’t let him”.
Still, you can’t blame Arsene Wenger for being delighted that the best defensive midfielder in the world has decided to stay put in N5 after all. “I am of course very pleased,” Wenger gushed like the Ganges in monsoon season. “We were in a situation where we could lose a very big player at a period of the season where it would be impossible to replace him. And [it’s good] for the confidence of the fans too – for them it would have been a big blow.” Perhaps. But surely not every Arsenal fan will be delighted at Vieira’s shabby treatment of the club – again – will they?
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QUOTE OF THE DAY
“I suppose a lot will be made of the fact that I’m 34 but while I’m struggling berlin film festival ends canada goose jacket sponsorship amid a bit with keeping my hair, really I’m still just a young boy” – Alan Shearer is losing more than his hair, isn’t he?
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EL MICKY
When Michael Owen was crowned European Footballer of the Year in 2001, the prospect of him being sold for less than £10m seemed as likely as Mo Mowlam becoming the face of Chanel. At one point, £40m was mentioned. But with Owen’s contract running down and his hamstrings twanging more than John Squire’s guitar during I Am The Resurrection, his value has plummeted. Then, today, raffish Rafa Benitez revealed that Owen is definitely off to Real Madrid – and, frankly, he looked about as crestfallen as a lottery winner guzzling ice-cool Hoegaarden in a jacuzzi with Girls Aloud.
“I wanted him to stay,” quipped Benitez, sniggering like a teatime email hack at his own joke. “[But] the end it was an impossible situation to control. The money from his sale will be used to balance the team.” It’s a good deal for Owen, too. He’s been far too one-dimensional for far too long and, if he can’t improve his game alongside world-class players like Zidane and Ronaldo, then this cliché doesn’t deserve to be written. He might even learn how to take a penalty.
And it’s buy canada goose coat uk certainly a good deal for Antonio Nunez, who has been thrown into the deal as a sweetener. “We think it’s a great move to a very professional club,” warbled his Mr 10%. “It’s very important that they wanted him.” Clearly nobody else did: though he’s 25, Nunez never started a La Liga game for Real. He’s about as much of a galactico as Des Lyttle. “He is hard working, quick and could help cover the absence of [Vladimir] Smicer on the right,” cooed his agent. The new Smicer? You couldn’t make it up.
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THE RUMOUR MILL
Tottenham will have to pay £8m to sign shaggy-haired scamperer Owen Hargreaves.
Michael Carrick has been unsettled by Arsenal’s withdrawal from the race to sign him, and may decide to sit out his contract and leave on a Bosman at the end of the season, much to the displeasure of Hammers manager Alan Pardew.
Aston Villa hope to sign James Beattie for £6m, with Swedish striker Marcus Allback moving in the other direction. Charlton are also sniffing round the preening predator.
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NEWS IN BRIEF
Sir Alex Ferguson has denied reports Louis Saha would be out for four months, insisting he will return in three weeks. “Louis has not had an operation, and has been training terrifically for the last week and doing everything apart from kicking a ball,” he growled.
England Under-21 squad to face Ukraine on Tuesday: Ashton (Crewe), Bent (Ipswich), Bentley (Norwich), Camp (Derby), Carson (Leeds), Carter (Birmingham), Clare (Stockport), Cole (Aston Villa), Davenport (Coventry), Downing (Middlesbrough), Ferdinand (West Ham), Harding (Brighton), Hoyte (Arsenal), Hunt (Bolton), Kilgallon (Leeds), Lonergan (Preston), Milner (Newcastle), O’Neil (Portsmouth), Pennant (Arsenal), Reo-Coker (West Ham), Richards (Ipswich), Stead (Blackburn), Tonge (Sheffield United), Welsh (Liverpool), Westlake (Ipswich), Whittingham (Aston Villa).
Juninho’s agent claims the Brazilian turned down a move to Celtic, deciding to stay and fight for his place at the Riverside. best ideas about canada goose parka on pinterest Nothing to do with money, then.
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FIVER LETTERS
“Re: Luis Figo to Spurs. Why would anyone take any notice of your pinko leftie bog roll of a paper anyway? If you lot had your way this country would be swimming with even more asylum seekers and eventually become a Muslim State” – David McLeod.
“Brilliant addition. Make it a daily section of the Fiver” – Bill Russell.
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TONIGHT’S TV AND RADIO
BBC1: A Question Of Sport Premiership Special (10.35pm) More holiday tales, from someone whose email we deleted and who shall thus remain nameless.
ITV1: World Sport (4.25am) “A mate of mine, who really should remain nameless, was in a small Asian state while doing some research for his PhD”, says ‘Jack’.
Channel 4: Brazilian Football Championship (3.15am) “During the nation’s annual independence day celebrations he developed a vigorous nosebleed.”
Sky Sports 1: Premier League Preview Show (7pm & 5am) We hate those; right annoying they are.
Soccer AM’s All Sports Show (4am) “Grabbing the nearest piece of cloth to best place buy canada goose jacket toronto hand to stem the flow more info, he was surprised to find himself being dragged away by the police.
Sky Sports 3: Live Football League: Cardiff v Plymouth (7.30pm) “In case you hadn’t guessed…”
Sky Sports Xtra: Soccer AM’s All Sports Show (10pm) We hadn’t.
Premier League Preview Show (11pm) Seriously. Not a clue.
The Premiership Years (11.30pm) “…the nearest piece of cloth happened to be the national flag.
Radio 5: Sport on 5 (7pm) “Then followed a night in prison, some bribery, a meeting down a dark alley with a member of the country’s home office, and the incineration by cheap lighter of my friend’s criminal file.
Talksport: Football First (7pm) “And everyone lived happily ever after.
Newstalk 106 (www.newstalk106.ie): Off the ball with Ger Gilroy (7pm) Send your emails, marked What I Did On Holiday, to the.boss@theguardian.com
* * * * * * * * * * * *
SUBSCRIBE TO THE FIVER
You can subscribe and unsubscribe at www.footballunlimited.co.uk/Fiver/Redirect
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CONTACT THE FIVER
If you want to contact the Fiver, email the.boss@theguardian.com.
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IT’S A LONG WAY TO BOLTON
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